It's nothing wrong with being a failure, nor does it define you as a bad person. You have to shake it off, understanding that life goes on. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off and create a new plan of action.
The genesis of all the problems that occurred in your life starts with you. You can create all the excuses your heart desires, despite the pain you've incurred, that arrow still points back to you. If it's inner peace your heart desires, be accountable for those self inflicted wounds and peace will soon follow.
Society would have you to believe it's winners and losers during divorces involving children. So let's be perfectly clear, anything involving children during domestic break ups, children are always the loser. And for those that think having a degree along with a successful career defines success being raised by a single parent, you're wrong, that child is still the loser.
It comes a time in life you outgrow the things you once took so personal during those youthful years. You evolve away from taking things so personal because you understand that life moves on. And although that may be hard for some people, it's called growth.
Do you realize how badly you are consumed with negative thoughts? Some people are so preprogrammed on thinking negative, they miss out on blessings waiting for them. It's no such thing as negative hypotheticals on "if it were meant to be God would allow you to have it", that's nonsense. It's no place in the bible God condones negative thinking and lost hope. Negative thinking generates depression and failure. Positive thinking generates positive results.
It's the smallest things in life that go unnoticed. Those unnoticed subtleties can generate enormous pleasure designed to extend great health and life longevity. On the other hand, ignoring those subtleties can shorten your lifespan as well as create unhappiness in your life.